More Other's Conversations

- I talked to my dad about this, and, I don't talk to my dad about relationships or any, or, like, really much.
- Talking to your dad about relationships is a good thing, it's a good thing. It really is. Cause a) he's a man...
- Yeah.
- b) he's a knowledgeable man and, c)he knows you.
(all laugh)
- You know?
- Exactly.
- He can piece it all together ...he's like that, like, voice if reason, that men's perspective, that you're like, what the fuck were they thinking, and he's like , well actually...
- They're boys, is what my father says, they're not men yet. You need to find yourself a man, cause these boys like, for lack of better words, don't have the same maturity you do...
- No they don't, they really don't.

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- I'm glad I made it through the rest of the day, it's so funny how things you like completely change how your day goes. At two o'clock, I was like, fucking shoot me! I'm so tired and so not wanting to be here! I feel like I'm going to barf! Then, I'm like, oh! I love school! Woo! Yoga! Woo!
- Yeah, for sure. It's just good vibes to get such good feedback...
- Yeah, and that room's really nice, like, because of the time of day, the sun is coming in and when we finish, its dark. So there's something really nice about being in Shavasana.
- For sure.

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- Are those lights in your hat?
- Yes ma'am.
- That's ingenious.
- You think?
- I won't shine it in your eyes, but its got a strobe thingy...
- Oh...
- And it's got a steady beam.
- Oh is that for biking or jogging?
- Yeah, camping, whatever, um, I recently lost my exterior lighting...
- Or just to start a conversation.

More Others Conversations

- B.C. loves to abbreviate... everything!
(all laugh)
- I have never seen so many abbreviations in my whole life. I came here and I was like hat is with this, I.C.B.C., E.C.V.C, C.C.B.C....
- U.B.C., S.F.U....
- V.C.C.
(all laugh)
- Why don't we abbreviate everything? (laugh)
(all laugh)
- That's something I've never heard of...
- Why do people have a problem with like, speaking words? Everything is like, (laugh) and everything rhymes with B.C. It's like, why?
- (laugh) It's our own propaganda machine.... It's weird I never noticed it?
- It's so ridiculous. They love it here, they love it here...
(all laugh)

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- Have you guys seen Magnolia?
- No.
- Its a good movie to be watched only once, don't watch it again because you'll hate it, the first time, you will like it.
- That happened to me with Once.... the movie.
- It's called Once?
- It's called Once.
- That's pretty funny.
- And i watched it like, ... we watched it once and loved it, watched it a second time and hated it.
- (laugh) What, is it a comedy?
- No it's a musical...
- It's an Irish guy, a street musician and he works at a ....
- Its a really long music video....

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- The playground in there was a masterpiece, sorry... if I'm talking your ear off...
- Not it's ok.
- It's a masterpiece. Its death by a thousand cuts. The original one was just a gem. You know what I'm talking about. But, you get your socialist, pseudo-socialists, you know, and they don't even know that they're rich. We're given socialism by Allan-er D. Roosevelt, or anyway can't get too mad 'cause its a mad mad world and you know, you, they don't, probably don't mean no harm. But, its just insanity... but the good side is its just showing us... we look at that line going down to Richmond, down Cambie, we look at this... we're looking at the Convention Centre even the Convention people didn't want and say well why is it that we are creating all these bullshit jobs? Because we can't settle the land claims. i mean why are we paying a million or seventy, seven hundred and fifty dollars in [inaudible], because the land claims are haywire and while we're at it we might as well go back to 1601 and re-open the Magna Carta......

March 6th - Art Handler

So, today is March 6^th, I haven’t made an entry for a couple of days um… just been preoccupied with other things…. Today… um…. I left work early… just sitting in the park just killing time… going to be an art handler at the auction today, just kind of, uh, as my volunteer sort of shtick with um…. with Western Front….. um……… yeah. My shoes are kind of coming apart, I'm actually wearing these awful, awful shoes, put some really good insoles in them though, hopefully that makes a mediocre shoe, awful shoes plus good insoles, mediocre shoe….. Um… I don’t know, I don’t know what I really want to talk about , its beautiful today… in the park soaking up some sun couldn’t feel any, anymore … um… satisfied at this moment……. Huh……. I'm wearing tights today, as in like nylons, as in like pantyhose, like, tights. It’s the first time I've worn these in like, years. Like really, years years and, actually that’s not true I wore a pair, umm….. a couple weeks ago but, I anyway, , always hated tights just always, I just don’t know what it was about them I hated. And I never wore them and I never really, liked wearing outfits that required me to wear tights….. um… but actually recently, I find them quite comfortable and, um…. I've been wearing them, I don’t know, its interesting…. Anyway… uhhhh yeah… so tights, uh I shaved today for the first time in years years years as well um… usually I wax but my wax lady wasn’t around.. uh yesterday and I really just wanted to wear, a shorter dress today and uh….my legs would be showing and even though my tights are black, there’s enough hair to uh… be noticeable no matter what….. um.. so ya.. I shaved.. I usually don't, yeah I usually don’t shave I'm not comfortable with it and actually surprisingly today, my legs weren’t chaffed and they didn’t feel weird, although I hate the feeling of subtle and that's what I'm going to have stubbly legs, but hopefully the hair will grow fast and I can get to the wax lady asap……… funny dogs.. so I don’t know, today…. I feel a little discouraged and defeated…. Maybe its cause I'm tired and I didn’t take my vitamin E today, I mean my vitamin D today…… I don’t know, I don’t know… I was kind of looking at submitting and calls for submissions and residencies and I feel really overwhelmed actually…. I'm graduating this year and I’ve shown a little bit like, puh, not outside of the school not in Vancouver anyway…. And uh…. It's kind of, I'm kind of freaking out…… actually cause … I don’t know………. I don’t know……I don’t know what to do next, I mean I do but ….. I don’t know.. um…..what the quality of my work is like…. I mean I know I've spent a lot of time on it and I almost … puh.. I almost wish I had kind of … dealt with things faster I don’t know whats up with me and dealing with things faster but I just feel like people produce things… quite …. Um… steadily…. Or maybe not actually…. Some people I know don’t produce things quite, consistently and… um…. But I guess I kind of want to be, one of those people who’s constantly making things and I feel, like I am, you know, like I'm constantly thinking of ideas and reworking them etcetera etcetera… Actually I spend a lot of time reworking them… most of my time is reworking them… but you know I just feel like I can't , put my name behind something that I haven’t genuinely invested into and…. I don’t know I just want, ….. to show something different… actually I just want to show… I think that’s fair,…. I think that’s pretty much what all of us want to do after school is show……………. I just hope that all of this volunteering and huh…schmoozing, cause I'm not a schmoozer…and, you know, making my self visible and available and so on is going to benefit my chances and maybe .. I've put my eggs in the wrong basket but everyone I've spoken to has talked to me about networking , and, I felt until very recently that I didn’t really know anyone and I really didn’t have a network and I don’t feel like I have a network now but I do feel like, a few people know me………. Not anyone, maybe... I just, I mean, I, just don’t know. At the same time I think I'm opinionated enough at school that I've pissed the wrong people off I mean I just …… within the sort of intellectual circles I'm not accepted…… you know like, the curating, writing bunch….. not that I'm not accepted, that's not true, …. But…. Whatever.. and as far as like... the showing goes…. I haven’t really shown outside of school and not that that’s really that big of a deal at the moment but, it is a big deal to show and, I guess I guess I just really want a really finished substantial body of work after all this time.. so that I can for real for real show it but, feel good about it, confident in my decisions…. I just don’t want to be a freaking gallery secretary for the rest of my life, you know…… we’ll see………… I want to put my name on the volunteer list of the CAG too….. not to like, you know, spread myself to thin or as well but like, genuinely to kind of like touch base in a lot of places…… I can't tell what time it is on City Hall usually I can see it… its so bright.. its so beautiful, cherry blossoms are out and the grass is green, although its always green but like, so much is blooming…so much is blooming its actually causing a bit of a ruckus, with people and their hay fever and their allergies………………… I'm tired of my job……. huh……… I kind of can't wait to have, options you know, and not just looking for part time work that pays me twelve dollars an hour…………………. Part of me really hopes (!) gets into school, I know I talk about the same things all the time, you know, I don’t even know why I do that, I don’t know I guess this is what's on my mind right now…. It just seems really weird that, you know, if I'm going to be talking out loud about my thoughts, that my thoughts just seem to circulate around the same things…although, not always….I'm starting a (%) book, I haven't really read him/her yet, although I have an idea of what she's talking about, its interesting cause even in her/his introduction, which I started, like, I read one page of his/her book, um… s/he mentions (#) and that’s kind of a good sign for me and s/he’s critical of him/her which is, an even better sign… for me….. god I love intelligent wo/men…………… I’ve been part of such a boys club lately….. I want to be part of a girls club………………. I’ve actually been thinking a lot about…. Doing things……. Its (*)’s fault, kind of, cause now s/he’s single and has a handful of things on his/her plate to do and which are do-able and although I could do a lot of things, but, I just still feel like, if I want to do my, apply for my masters, next year, so much needs to taken into consideration…….. we’ll see… part of me is so happy with my partner…..at the moment that I just… can't imagine my reality without her/him but at the same time I wish that, I don’t know, I don’t know what I wish, I like, the idea of spending the rest of my life with (!), I don’t like the idea of, us being so co-dependent on each other…………….we’ll see…. Once all the schooling's done its going to be a completely different story you know, I wont have to, you know, haul the financial weight, he wont have the haul the financial weight, its kind of like…. You know, but I still want to like, pick up and go to a residencies and pick up and go do this and pick up and go do that and, our schedules wont necessarily… coincide and I think, that’s going to be problematic with us…… although I think (!) is realizing more and more that….. given our ambitions, we should deal with the problematic part of it sooner than later and maybe, that’s kind of an acceptance?....... I don’t know, sometimes I feel like I cant even talk to him/her about such issues…. s/he does want to think about us living separately and neither do I but, I'll do it for school…. And I think s/he knows that and I think s/he’s afraid of it…………I don’t know. I just have a real problem.. devoting my life, to someone…………. And sacrificing……. Huh things…… I don’t really, I'm not really good at sacrificing anything quite frank. That’s not true actually, I'm a very loyal friend and partner and I sacrifice a lot you know, but at the same time…. I don’t, want…. To sacrifice things like, a graduate acceptance or you know, whatever, I'm not sure actually….. and its all too soon to say you know, as I told (!), we’ll see what happens as far as his/her application goes and honestly if s/he doesn’t get accepted, then, onward ad upward and next and lets get out of here and do something………….. really interested in kind of getting out of here and doing things……..I'm really interested in just, a different reality…. From this reality you know, and its really funny cause I don’t think I would have been so curious of other realities if I hadn’t come here in the first place and experienced other reality-ness of this place and, …… I don’t know………………. I like the other reality-ness of this place and experiencing something completely different but I mean completely different, I mean don’t get me wrong this was a culture shock I wasn’t too fond of the differences…. probably still not too fond of the differences but…… I've come to appreciate the experience………. You know , I mean, as I told (!), like, and I'm so embarrassed to say this but I haven’t even been to Europe yet……….. what art student….. hasn’t been to Europe… should be the first trip I ever took….. but you know, I bound myself to other things….and…… you know, I want to do a lot………. I don’t know, I want to do a lot…… I'm actually really just ….. ready to do a lot…………………. A lot of bikers everywhere its really nice to see……its encouraging…I'm going to get on my bike….. I'm happy to get on my bike… except my bike weights a fucking ton….. huh.. I just want a little speedy road bike….. you know, I just need to take a fucking picture of my bike and put it in craigslist…. Somebody's going to love that shit…..I also need to give (^) a call and see if there, isn’t a little road bike frame that would work, in her/his pile-o-bikes………………… …….. five till eleven… that six hours, that’s ok… that’s ok…….thing is, I don’t know, so eleven and I started at … let say 9 this morning so that’s , fourteen hours…. With a bit of a break in the middle….. I love this housing co-op you know, … huh…..I'm really interested in co-op living and , you know, different co-ops work in different ways and ideally I'd be at an artist co-op with sort of like studios and what not really any co-op……………………. hmmmm… interesting….. they want to shoot a movie or a pilot um… at this beautiful co-op building I don’t blame them, it is beautiful…… with its gardens and its stuff…………. So cute…. Cat climbing on a bicyclist, maybe s/he bumped into him/her and this is his/her way of, loving him/her……………………. It’s a beautiful day…………. You know I'm pretty set on not walking on that side of the street ever again, although I love Foundation, that, like gauntlet of dog shit is unreal……..oh………………. its only…… four twenty… what a great time eh… although really that’s not bad.... really it isn’t.. they’re going to feed me a bit……… …… wow……………………………… I don’t know, need to kill some time…. And I'll step into somewhere.. across the street should be good….. here we go… ok.. well.. I guess this is it I'm on Main street so I guess I'll stop talking cause its broad daylight and I feel really strange and a…… I'll talk to you later…………. Okie dokie.

March 3rd - Sisters

Ok so, hold on……… ok so .. I'm going to do a short talk tonight on my way to the bus stop… um…. March 3^rd… just 'cause.. I have some stuff going on at home that I need to make it home for. What a good talk with (^) ummm… I felt really good about it actually.. I don’t know, I …. I get so intimidated around intelligent people, you know, like (%) and (") and (^) and especially people who can write well cause I feel like I just cant write but, hopefully…. This exercise is going to help me cause, that’s , that’s really why I'm doing this is to kind of figure out what it is that I say.. that I don’t write, that makes sense, that doesn’t makes sense when I write it down, its just, I don’t know, today I feel a little dumbfounded…… I don’t know why…. Hoooo.. I got a power walk going….. ummmm…… what do I want to talk about today? What do I want to talk about today? I don’t really know whats on my mind, actually I do know what on my mind… um… home…. Home is where the heart is.. home is…… where I’ve been calling every morning and every night for the past…. Puh… I think week…. Home is … mums hugs and dad’s kisses… huh… my sisters actually….. home is my sisters… the only people I miss more than mum and dad are my sisters and I sent (!) this fantastic dress, its going to hug him/her ballet body like no bodies business… umm… a) I’m envious s/he gets to wear things like that and b) I'm ecstatic at the fact that s/he gets to wear stuff like that, s/he’s beautiful I love him/her I miss him/her so much…. So much, so much so much so much. My best of best of best of friends and the one person who like ……… is there.. every step of the way, gets it every step of the way and I don’t even need to talk to him/her s/he just knows…. s/he just knows and I don’t know how much it says for me to be eight years older than him/her and us kinda be on the same page, maybe I'm slow, maybe s/hes fast, who cares. The fact of the matter is that , I get , I got someone who gets me, which is really important, and its not that, other people don’t get me, its just that s/he really really really gets me and I, I love that about him/her. I miss, ….. I miss (@) too, so much, actually, so much I cant even put it into words because, s/he doesn’t work, in words….. s/he cant be described in words.. it it, even whole essays haven’t been able to really pin down who, ….. huh… who (@) is, this combination of, I don’t know I don’t know, (!) describes him/her as Remedios the Beauty from A Hundred Years of....,Marquez's...

Other People's Conversations

- But when you say stuff like I want to spend the rest of my life with you... That's a fucking bold statement.
- That is a bold statement, you have to take responsibility for that.
- It's pretty shocking to hear it... too.
- Yeah...
- Like, ... I freaked out a little bit.... when I heard it.
- Yeah... I freaked out a little bit too, I'm like, that's a long time man.
- Well especially when you're just a fuck buddy with somebody... You're like, what?! You did not just say let's get married.
- Yeah.
- What?! Or how about you tell me you love me or something? Or even that you like me? What?!

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- But you know, like, paid attention, maybe?
- Right.
- This guy showed no interest at all, and I was like, o.k. let's.... and (#) was like, let's leave?
- (laugh)
- And I'm like, yeah, o.k., done. (laugh)
- (laugh)
- And then we went outside and we just burst out laughing, we're like, we lost him at Relational Aesthetics didn't we? I'm like, I think we lost him before that. (laugh)... And we're like man we intimidate men, I know I intimidate men and I kind of like, enjoying doing it.
- Yeah, for sure.


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- Did you read... there was an article about Commercial Drive thing this morning?
- About the dudes with the machetes?
- Yeah, did you hear about that before?
- Somebody mentioned it to me
- Yeah, I.... two...
- Like, 4th and Commercial?
- Yeah, like, right at my house, nice eh?
- What happened?
- It's two young guys, I think, tried to rob someone with a machete and I don't know what happened but it just said in the newspaper that they put up patrol all from the Commercial Drive beat.
- Oh, wow!
- In a non-racist way, it seems like punk ass native kids that hang out, its like blood. It's like, they're so tough, like, well they act tough, right....[inaudible]... I heard a bunch of them fight, there's a fight there like every other week.
- Hmm.

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- I had purple jeans shorts, like, kind of short purple jean shorts, and a matching purple tom from Cotton Ginny. Like, head to toe purple outfit. It was so bad, with like, dollar ninety-nine canvas hightops.
- How old are you (^)?
- Turning twenty-seven.
- O.k cause when I was... can't even remember how old I was, but one of my favorite outfits as a kid was these brown, cotton tights and I wore them with my overall shorts...
- Oh! I did that...
- ... and I had like, this patterned print collard shirt...
- One strap down? One strap down?
- Yeah! One strap down, right. With like, my hair all slick like to one side...
- With a little poof, like a spritz of spray in the front, like a little wave in the front, (laugh)
- (laugh)
- Totally! Totally!
- The best was when guys would shave their whole heads but still have the bangs... You can thank Vanilla Ice for that.... (All laugh)


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-No, but look, if you ask me how many kids I want, it's seven. How many kids my wife wants is a different story.
- Maybe if you're rich, you know, like Mel Gibson has a big family. he has the money, he's a Roman Catholic, fine go and have your seven kids...
-He's not a Roman Catholic!

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